All   About   Sex  
Sex For One, Please...
Yeah, You Guessed It - Masturbation!
WELCOME!  You've chosen the single-most called upon page at AAS!  That's cool with us - we know that this is a topic of great interest to kids and adults alike!


Secretly, it's always been a popular thing to do, but finally, in this new age of openness, we can really, really TALK ABOUT IT!  Young people today have access to more information about sex and their own bodies than ever before, and will hopefully know a freedom that none before them have known.

Something really surprising, even to our open minds and positive outlook about sex, is what we have seen in the first "Teen Sexuality" Poll results.   The first of our polls focused on masturbation and nudity, and asked how teens feel about masturbating, with one possible answer being that they "don't masturbate" at all (other options were "I feel great", "I feel good about it", "I feel guilty", "I can take it or leave it", and "masturbation is bad").

We pretty much expected to see a majority of results showing that teens today DO masturbate - at least once in a while.   After all, the experts and researchers say that most people masturbate, especially during puberty/adolescence.   But we were NOT expecting the results we got, and we think that this may be a surprise to most of you reading this ... (Aren't you curious?)

There is an incredible wealth of information on masturbation on the net, as it is one of the most popular topics with young and old alike.  So much, in fact, that you are likely to see stuff here that you've seen elsewhere on the net (and don't EVEN try to tell us you haven't been tearing up the 'net in search of satisfying your own most deviant and secret carnal desires, you horn-dogs!).  

But then, maybe you are new to this and we are the first place you've stumbled onto in your search for sexual knowledge ( yeah, we know, most of you are here "just to read the articles" - yeah, right! ).  

Our stuff is broken into several categories shown in the next column.


Did you know that more than 150 years ago, Masturbation was actually discussed as a disease? - Take a look at this old treatment manual for physicians !

















You can enter whatever galaxy appeals to you, but keep in mind that the masturbation BASICS are geared towards those who are just discovering the power of creating pleasure inside their own bodies, and to those who might have heard negative things about it, like that it is a "sin" (it's not).

MASTURBATION

The Basics

Some Suggestions For Parents!

Female Masturbation
A Short _ Beautiful Essay

Advanced Techniques

The "Mother Of Masturbation" Speaks
About This Website!

Personal Discovery

The Politics Of Masturbation

Masturbation Humor

Ever Been Caught???? Tell Us!   ---   Read Other People's Accounts!

Through The Ages _
Around The World

Famous People Speak

Other Resources

The "JackinWorld" Collection



© Copyright 1997/1998/1999 All About Sex /rbb
All Rights Reserved


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Masturbation "Basics"

Maybe touching your own penis or clitoris and vulva is new to you and you are wondering what in the heck is going on inside you...  or maybe you've been at it a while and are just now figuring out that you are not the only person in the world doing it!  Either way, you're here to get some facts, and boy, have we got them for you!

 "Just The Facts, Ma'am, Just The Facts"

 Even MORE Facts About Masturbation

 Masturbation List Of Resources

Are Humans The Only Animals Who Masturbate?

Advantages Of Masturbation

Other Words For Masturbation


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Advanced Applied Masturbation 101

Unless you are among the masturbationally-challenged (i.e. being in 10th grade but masturbating at a 7th grade level)  you've probably graduated beyond just "playing with yourself ".  If so, this is the section for you!

Benefits Of Masturbation

 Thinking About Masturbating With A Partner?

Advantages Of Masturbation

 Mutual Masturbation Techniques

Female Masturbation Essay

 Masturbation Is Healthy!

 Masturbation For Good Health

Masturbation Techniques


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Tales Of Personal Discovery

For now we only have one little piece in this section, but it is well worth the reading, especially if you don't understand why your parents or other adults you know are so uncomfortable with this subject.  Your generation has a real chance here to bring these kinds of stories to an end once and for all by teaching YOUR children (when you are a parent yourself)  that masturbation is an excellent way for them to get to know their body.

What Were You Told Would Happen If You Touched Yourself?

Anti-sex Religious Teaching Causes Boy's Suicide

Famous People Quoted On Masturbation

Ever Been Caught Masturbating???    It's Sooooo Embarrassing! - See Who's Been Caught and What Happened, Or Tell Us Your Story!

Kids Speak Out On Masturbation! - See What Other Kids Think About It!

The Teen Sexuality Poll (#2) - Focus On Masturbation _ Nudity

Teen Sexuality Poll Results


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Ever Been Caught "Touching Yourself?"

Tell Us!

Without a doubt, get caught masturbating is a kid's worse fear...   a fear that exceeds that of the "monster" in the closet, the creature under the bed, or fearing the dark.   One outgrows those fears, but the fear of having someone see you playing with your genitalia, maybe even in the throws of cumming, when you can't possibly react fast enough, only grows greater the more you mature.

Sometimes the person walking in on you is polite and cool about it, excusing themselves, and perhaps later telling you that it was "ok" to be doing what you were doing.  Sometimes, though, the person - often a parent - reacts with horror (because our sexually-ill American society prefers to "pretend" that children are incapable of experiencing sexual pleasure) - usually traumatizing the child for life.   The worst reaction comes from usually very strict religious parents who have been known to beat the offending child and yell at them that they'll "go to hell"!.

Thankfully, although those days are not gone, things *ARE* changing, and we think that the Internet will one day be recognized as THE central factor in masturbation becoming a topic that most people feel comfortable talking about.   It is probably the one single most talked about thing on the Internet (a result of centuries of sexual repression in our country), and we are now seeing it laughed and joked about on television a lot.   Lately we've heard from many of you that kids in your school *DO* talk and joke about it openly and in mixed company (we'll bet that the religious community LOVES hearing that...    NOT!)   :)

Well, some people still *DO* get caught masturbating, and some can look back on it now and laugh.  Other's remember their experience as a terrible moment in their life made worse by the person who caught them.  Whichever might have happened to you, we'd like to hear about it, and share some of the stories with other kids on the site.   That's why we are adding this new feature, where you can tell us about the time YOU got caught, and read about other's like you.

Below you can write us anonymously to tell us your story.   We don't want fake stories, please, or vulgarities - we want TRUE and interesting (and maybe a little sexy or humorous) accounts of what happened.   If your story isn't an amusing one, that's ok too - maybe people will learn from your unfortunate experience.   The more interesting stories will get posted for all to read, and if you really want yours to be posted, you'll have to say more than just "I got caught when my Dad walked in.". DETAILS, people, we want DETAILS!

Your Name, Of Course: - Female   Male

Your Age When It Occurred:    What Year?

OK, Now The Good Stuff!    TALK!:

Any Other Comments?:










Teen Poll On Masturbation - Surprising Results!

In the 8 weeks it was posted, we took in well over 1200 responses, which was pretty amazing to us to begin with!    Out of those 1200 responses, no more than a "handful" - about 22 - responded that they did NOT masturbate or that "masturbation is bad".   Yep, that's right... aprox. 1178 out of 1200 acknowledged that they *do* masturbate, anywhere from several times a day to only once or twice a month.   22 out of 1200 stated they don't at all.   WOW!     That means that roughly 98.25% of respondents *DO* masturbate!!

What does that tell you about your peers?

Now, to be fair and honest, the results of the poll are still being tabulated (by hand, unfortunately) and these numbers are based on a quick review of all 1200 responses.   Exact numbers will be out soon, broken down in various ways.   These results, it should be noted, are not scientific, and were taken for the fun of learning what your peers are thinking and believing (and obviously DOING!).   Still, based on the free-flow text answers in the polls, we DO believe that the vast majority of these were completed by REAL teenagers.  Two other interesting early results noted were that a large majority of respondents were told by someone that masturbation was bad or wrong;   ...and, that a large majority of young girls WOULD, if on a topless beach where there were other females going topless, go TOPLESS also.   Again, WOW! - What a surprising result!   We thought the vast majority of girls in America would NOT go topless, and are embarrassed when their breasts begin to develop...   but this poll tells us that girls are feeling a lot better about their bodies - especially their breasts - than we thought.   Now THAT is real progress!  

The Results Are Finally In!


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Comments From Betty Dodson About This Website!

We are very honored and encouraged by the words expressed by Dr. Dodson after we met and she spent time reviewing the All About Sex website:

    AllAboutSex is a must visit site for everyone interested in the sexual well being of America's youth. The information is thoughtful, and best of all, we get to hear from the kids themselves. In the many decades I've been advocating masturbation as the ongoing love affair we all have with ourselves throughout our lifetime, society continues to deny the sexuality of children.   A big mistake, especially if we want our children to become happy, healthy and sexually expressed adults.

    Betty Dodson, Ph.D.
    Author: Sex for One

For those of you unstudied in the arts and sciences of championship-level masturbation, the significance of this endorsement by Dr. Dodson deserves explanation.   If you are one of the lucky kids or adults who today enjoys hours of guilt-free self-pleasuring, and perhaps have even been told by your parents that it is normal, healthy and "ok" to do, there is a good chance that this lady is responsible for that.   Even though masturbation has long been treated as a "guy thing", it is interesting that the first sexologists advocating masturbation as a normal, healthy activity that comes naturally to both sexes and to all ages were women, with Dr. Dodson leading the way.   In 1974, Dr. Dodson broke new ground by writing a book that has since become almost like the "bible" for masturbators, initially called "Liberating Masturbation" where she took on the psychologists, the feminists (she is a major feminist as well), and the religious leaders of America responsible for so much of the negativity felt by society about sex.  

Her book has been updated and re-released several times, most recently in 1996 under the new title: "Sex For One: The Joy Of Selfloving", in which she teaches us how ANYONE can learn to make love alone without feelings of guilt or loneliness, and explains why masturbation is sexually and spiritually fulfilling for both men and women [and girls and boys].   Not only is it the safest sex, but sharing masturbation can also be an erotic treat for couples who want to learn more about each other's sexual responses.

She also teaches that selfloving is not just for times in-between lovers or for social misfits.   Masturbation is the joyful and ongoing love affair that each of us has with ourselves throughout childhood, adulthood and the golden years of old age.   Most recently she has taken an interest in the same subject as I and we hope to work together in the near future on the behalf of children and adolescents to perhaps once and for ever rid our society of the decades of truly bad feelings we put many children through in their journey of self-discovery.

Her opinion of this website is important because it helps to establish that these articles and this project are NOT just the trappings of a few sex-crazed perverts, but are instead legitimate points of view and theories on teaching children about sex and sexuality.   What is happening here at this website is truly historic and we are, indeed, blazing new trails in how sexuality is perceived by the public.   Not only can adolescents and pre-adolescents learn from this website, but hopefully, parents and other adults can learn from the kids themselves, as Dr. Dodson so elegantly pointed out, by listening to what they are telling us about their sexual feelings, desires and experiences.   It is time for us to accept that our children ARE sexual beings and we should not fear their sexuality or their sexual development.   Guide it along, protect them from exploitation, teach them, give them values about respect for each other's privacy and each other's bodies, and let Nature take it's course, but don't FEAR IT.

You can learn more about this great lady in our "Sexuality Pioneers" section, or you can visit her new website at:

www.BettyDodson.com

... where you will find a great list of interesting articles on masturbation and sexuality, in general, and some of the letters she has received by people who had their entire lives changed by reading her books, seeing her video or by participating in one of her body workshops.   There are also some very good excerpts from her books, and one of these days we may talk her into putting her beautiful erotic artwork on display as well.


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Some Thoughts On Masturbation - For Parents

Hopefully, you have brought your child to this website and are using it as a tool to teach them your ideals about sex and sexuality.   Or, perhaps your child has brought YOU to our website.   Masturbation is our most popular topic for a couple of reasons - because it has been so ridiculously surpressed and taboo, but more importantly, because it is something sexual that children CAN RELATE TO THEMSELVES - not at "some point in the future" - but TO THEM, RIGHT NOW.  

It is the one sexual thing that most parents can agree on that kids should be permitted to do, although there are still some parents out there who teach horrible things about masturbation and, as we have sadly discovered since starting this site, there are still parents out there who actually beat their children when they catch them masturbating.   If you think YOU have negative feelings about sex (that you don't want to pass to your children), you should read some of the "I Got Caught!" 's and the "Kids Speak Out" 's about masturbation and see what some children are experiencing even today at the beginning of a new Century.   Some of them will flat out break your heart, and demonstrate just how badly our children (as a whole) need to be taught about masturbation being a normal, healthy thing for them to do.   It also demonstrates how EVERYONE needs to know about it and how our society needs change it's attitudes about sex and sexuality so that we stop encouraging and feeding the negative teachings.   Even though you may judge some of these stories to be extreme experiences at the hands of religious zealots, keep in mind that our long-taught negativity about kids and sex feed their extreme attitudes and allow them to spread their negativity to others.

So we are asking, ...no,   ...begging, parents to please don't assume that your child somehow "knows" that it is "ok" to masturbate, or worse, assume that they don't touch themselves for pleasure or have any need for sexual release (and therefore don't need to be told or taught about it).   And please don't assume that your child will "discover it" on their own, at the "right" time for them.   Not only is that depriving them of years of learning about their own body and sexual feelings (what feels good, what doesn't), it is leaving a large portion of their sexual development - their sexuality - to "chance", where any number of unpleasant or traumatic things might end up being their very first introduction to sex and sexuality.   To be truly sexually healthy adolescents and adults, a child's very first "brush" with sexual feelings should be pleasant ones that they can recall with fondness, and not one that is the result of some trauma or molestation or that they feel "bad" or guilty about.

We are also asking that parents take the additional steps of advocating for better, more positive and realistic sex education in our schools, including the teaching that masturbation is a normal, healthy thing for them to do.   At this time in our history, a very small, but extremely vocal powerful and well-funded minority of parents are driving the sex education issue in our federal and state governments, and on our local school boards.   That minority is very negative about sex and sexuality and have no hesitency about teaching our children that it is a "sin", or that it leads to other, unwanted and forbidden sexual behaviors and even that it causes psychological harm.   Of course, they really don't want kids taught ANYTHING positive about sex, though they tend to put some flowery terminology and say their main concern is "children having children" or similar political rhetoric.   The truth is that if there was no such thing as STD's or unwanted pregnancies, they would be no less objectional and no less negative.

But poll after poll, and study after study, show that close to 80% of all American adults believe that children should have positive and fully comprehensive sex education at school.   And we believe that most adults *DO* care about the sexuality of children - though to show it publicly is risky - and want their own children to have GOOD, POSITIVE feelings about their bodies, their sexual feelings, their sexual fantasies, and about masturbation.   It is up to today's parents, working with sex education professionals, to make sexual learning more open and positive, and to take an interest in helping their child develop positive attitudes about sex and being sexual.  

Soooo....   Parents, please, please sit your very young child down and tell them about masturbation and tell them that it is a GOOD thing for them to do if they wish.   As uncomfortable as it might be for you, it is so important that you overcome those negative feelings you were taught, and to put their sexual health and well-being above your own discomfort.   Keep in mind that your child knows you very well and is quite likely to pick up on whatever you are feeling as you explain masturbation and sexual feelings.   If you are obviously uncomfortable, they are likely to understand that and may be confused about why you are so uncomfortable about something you are telling them is good, is healthy and safe, and that is perfectly normal.     (Hey!     They just might have a good point there, don'tcha think?)

(seriously, parents, you should definitely TELL your children that it is "O.K." to do it, and that EVERYONE does it to some degree, but if you just can't bring yourself to say it, one suggestion we heard from a single parent say was that when she began to suspect that he was masturbating, she started putting a box of cleanex on the bedstand for her son, and he understood that to mean that she was aware of his masturbation and that it was o.k., or she wouldn't be providing the Kleenex.   To be more direct, try turning down their sheets before bedtime, and put a box of Kleenex right in the middle of the place they usually sleep - if it is on the bed itself, pretty much any kid can figure that out!    still, it is better to just tell them it is alright to do, and perhaps even that you do it, too.

Incidentally, something that has been coming up for discussion in the "I Got Caught!" stories from teens is something we had not really given much thought to before this.   We've been surprised at the number of teens telling of being caught masturbating by a parent, who then reassures them that it is "ok" to do, and often admit to their child that they, too, masturbate sometimes.   In many of the stories we've received, under one set of circumstances or another, the end result is that parent and child become much, much more open at home about masturbation and sometimes even masturbate together.

We are currently "mulling" that concept over and are not forming an opinion for now as to whether or not this is a good thing.   In all cases we've received, only 1 story involved anything even remotely non-consensual, and of course, we definitely oppose ANYONE being made to do something sexual that they do not WANT to do   ( simply because they don't object, that does not constitute consent.  Consent, in our mind, needs to have the element of desire... they must WANT to do whatever sexual activity they are engaging in, or it would be difficult to argue consent).   You can read for yourself the accounts of masturbating alongside a parent, and decide for yourself how you feel about them.   The overall tone we get from the teens writing in is that they think it is pretty cool and that they are generally glad they got caught.   We have also noticed that this often leads to the parent purchasing vibrators or other masturbation aids for their teen, and that is something we CAN support.

Last, because we want very much to be honest on this website and because we believe the vast majority of visitors to AAS are, indeed, teenagers, we post their stories as THEY tell them, which can sometimes be crude or disjointed and the spelling not so great.   Critics may say that some of the stories submitted to us are not real events, but are, instead, a fantasy that an adult or teen is trying to live out by pretending it really happened.   We believe that this is a small number and that most of these stories from kids are the real thing.   Judge for yourself.

If you liked the presentation of these notes, then you may want to visit the "Notes For Parents" section for more ideas and suggestions on how to use this website as a tool for teaching your children about sex and sexuality.


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The Politics Of Masturbation

It is hard to believe, and quite sad, really, that something as normal and natural and enjoyable and as stress-relieving and healthy as Masturbation is cannot be openly discussed and debated in America even as we are starting a new Century.   It is hard to believe that there are adults who still think that children, just by knowing about masturbation and sex, will have "lost their innocence", and that these facts of life should be "hidden away" from children.   Rather than losing their innocence, learning and talking about masturbation gives them something no other recent generation has had:   FREEDOM     Freedom from sexual repression and freedom from years and years of GUILT.   The articles below represent various efforts to get knowledge about masturbation out in front of the public (and yes, that includes children).

 Why Is Masturbation Still A 4-Letter Word?

 Is It Any Wonder? (That We Are So Screwed Up?)

 Joycelyn Elders, Sexuality Pioneer

Joycelyn Elders Speech On Masturbation

Betty Dodson, Sexuality Pioneer

Nancy Friday, Sexuality Pioneer

 The Censorship Of Nancy Friday

 What The Pope Says

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The "JackinWorld" Collection

It is not often that we are willing to send kids outside of this website... not just because we you here, visiting us, but also because we are very concerned about your safety.   While we can guarantee your safety here, we cannot guarantee or control what you will encounter when you leave here.   So, when we DO send you away, it is with a reminder that you should never reveal information about yourself that would let someone know where you live or who you are.   If you are going to a site that deals with sexuality (and that's pretty doggone likely), and you are a minor, we encourage you to do so with your parent's knowledge.   Other sites often have live chat and unsupervised discussion groups and bulletin boards, and these are places where kids can easily get themselves into trouble.  

There is a debate going on as to whether it is a good idea to allow teens to interact with others or with adults in cyberspace, sort of engaging in "cybersex", such as explicit sexual talk, discussions about where others might find the particular type of pornography they like, sexual flirting, and sexual online roll-play.   You might say that "sex-play" has gone cyber, and many people are truly uncomfortable with that (usually those who have never done it).   At the same time, other people say that this actually lets teens explore sex and sexuality (a little more fully than at this website), learning how to interact sexually with others, and to do so without actually engaging in sex.   It lets them learn about their own sexual arousal - basically, what turns them on, and what does not - and, as long as they follow common-sense rules about their identity, it is safe.   One parent commented that they were only facing reality in recognizing that their teenager was going to explore sex, as it quite normal for kids to do so during adolescence, and that they preferred their teen do it on-line, without the risk of STD's or pregnancy, than for them to do it in the real world.

There is one site in particular that we have known about for a good while that has some truly excellent information on it about masturbation.   The site is called "Jackin' World", as in "jackin' off", and is a site that has also shown that they really do care about the youth generation.   Therefore, we are providing links to some specific pages there, and a link to the main page of the site to explore as you wish.   Remember to be safe and act responsibly and maturely when you leave our midst.

You might enjoy these specific pages:

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